look in the mirror and keep on shining

as january ends and i start thinking about what my training will be for feb. and march, i have also realized i need to find a new motivation.

the past 2 years, i have had to view everyone on my team as a threat. they are one of many people standing in the way of my goal of making the team. i wanted them to succeed, but also needed them to fail. if they played poorly and i played well, then my goal would be reached. but if they played well and i played well, that made things a lot more difficult.

one could argue that i needed and need to focus more on the controllables, and i did and do. i focused my energy on playing my game well, but i still thought about how other people were playing. it's not a good feeling to be rooting against people. these players provided the chip on my shoulder, the motivation to work hard.

this season, i need to put a new chip on my shoulder. they are my teammates and i want them to do well no matter what.

by realizing and embracing this, i think it is going to relieve a lot of pressure from my daily thoughts of practices. it is not saying that i am not going to work hard, but i am no longer working to earn a spot, i am working to by the best player i can be on the team.

in some ways, i think my new motivation has already begun and taken on a life of it's own.

i had reminder bands (livestrong bands) made up to say "outwork" and gave them to the high school players who come to my conditioning workouts.

i am going to use that one word as fuel.

outwork.

i will outwork my team. i will outwork the teams i play against. i will outwork you.